How Astrology Can Help You Create the Kind of Marriage You Dream About
According to tradition, June is THE MONTH to get married, although how that tradition originated is anyone’s guess. Some sources say it was the first month that water temperatures were warm enough for would-be brides to take their first after-winter bath! Others say it was because June was named after Juno, the goddess of love and marriage.
That’s all well and good, but if you look more closely at Juno’s marriage to Jupiter, you might want to think again — Jupiter fooled around a lot while Juno stoically stood by her man, remaining faithful but taking her revenge on the “other women” rather than on him. Not the standard you want to model your marriage after, is it? But then again, mythology was a lo-o-o-ong time ago, or was it?
But whatever its origins, June has become firmly entrenched in our culture as “the ideal time” to plan a wedding. But what does astrology have to say about that month, and why is the timing of a marriage even a consideration? Let’s look at that first…
You were born on a certain day and, assuming that astrology has some influence over most people, you possess your own set of characteristics, many of which you may share in common with others born under your sign. This, of course, is true of your would-be spouse as well.
What we don’t often consider is that anything “born” on a given day — whether a pet, a business, a marriage, anything that has a definite beginning in time — also has its own characteristics. The astrological influences bestow a set of qualities or energies to any new arrival in the world, which, from then on, has a life of its own. So when you get married, you are not only having to adjust and accommodate to your spouse, but you both are having to make adjustments to the requirements or influences of the marriage itself — that third thing that binds you together and has its own life energy.
You can see how it becomes important to understand that the wedding — actually the phrase “I now pronounce you husband and wife”– marks the birth or the beginning of the marriage. From then on, it’s not just “he and I” or “she and I” but both of you together within a larger context that will either be supportive of you or a trial to live with.
We’ve all heard of a great couple who fell apart after they got married. Looking at the wedding time can often reveal how incompatible their marriage energy was with both their energies, even though the two of them together worked well astrologically before they got married.
What does this mean for June weddings, or for marriages begun in any month? Let’s start with June and go through the signs, exploring the energies and feelings of each one so that you might be able to identify what time period is more likely to give you the kind of marriage you dream about. (Oh, it would be good if you considered a date that your spouse-to-be also agrees with!)
Most of June falls into the sign of Gemini, which actually begins around the 21st of May and goes through the 21st of June. Dates that the signs change to the next sign are called “cusps” and can vary from the 20th to the 23rd of any given month. In general, these are not the best days to plan to have your wedding, as the energy is in transition from one sign to the next sign and therefore carries a certain amount of tension because of that changeover. I’d recommend that you not choose any dates from the 19th through the 24th, just to be safe.
As you read through the paragraphs about the nature of each sign, trust your feelings and how you are responding to the information rather than trying to do a mental analysis. The qualities you feel most comfortable with are the ones that will best suit you and your partner, and will make for a more harmonious marriage.
MAY 21 – JUNE 21. GEMINI, the Twins. The challenge of Gemini is for two to become one, for the polarities or dualities of life to reconcile and find unity, at least on a mental level. In and of itself, this task aptly describes the path of marriage and, for this reason, is a fitting sign under which to exchange vows, even though it is not an emotionally rich sign. On the down side, that reconciling of opposites often ends up in partners feeling more like brother and sister. This kind of compatibility may be welcome in later life, but not so much early on in the union. The resiliency which Gemini is known for, however, may help a couple remain successfully married as long as the channels of communication are kept open, which this Mercury-ruled sign requires.
JUNE 21 – JULY 23. CANCER, the Crab. Now we enter the archetypal “home and family” sign. Cancer makes up in emotion for what Gemini lacks. A marriage under this sign will bind family members together on a deep, subconscious level. Sometimes this could extend to possessive attachment, to the exclusion of non-family individuals and non-family values/religion/politics — not the most tolerant sign when it comes to differences. A good sign for those whose ancestry and tradition are the most important things in life. Ruled by the moody Moon, the mother is often the dominant or central figure in the family unit, along with ancestral heritage.
JULY 23 – AUGUST 23. LEO, the Lion. In Leo the spotlight shifts to the children, the pride and joy of the family. Along with the creation of children comes the idea of creation on other levels — from games and play to creative self-expression in art, writing, dance, music, all outpourings of the self. Where Cancer may be introverted by nature, Leo can be extroverted. Entertaining may be a strong aspect of Leo marriages, as may the need for romance. This high-maintenance aspect of Leo is not tolerant of the taking-each-other-for-granted that spouses often fall into. When operating on its high side, Leo is generous and open-hearted, playful and sunny, like the Sun which rules it. The father in Leo marriages takes center stage.
AUGUST 23 – SEPTEMBER 23. VIRGO, the Virgin. The complexities of Virgo may not be the easiest energy to live with, as marriage under this sign requires partners to live to high standards with little reward except that things are “done right.” Under Virgo’s rulership we find health, service, obedience and cooperation, along with precision and attention to detail. Surely a marriage doesn’t get far without cooperation, but few couples may feel called to devote themselves and their marriage to service – whether to the community, country, religion or a cause. Teacher couples may do well here, as may health care professionals, engineers and clergy. But the critical-eyed aspect of Mercury through this sign might leave less selfless individuals feeling overly pressured, perhaps frustrated by this task-master energy.
SEPTEMBER 23 – OCTOBER 23. LIBRA, the Scales. Ah, Libra, the archetypal marriage sign. “We” not “I” is how this energy operates, and relationship evolves to an art form. This is not the sign for strong-willed or self-centered individuals, as Libra seeks tranquillity, harmony and peace. The smoothly flowing back-and-forth exchange of thoughts, feelings and ideas keep the Libra marriage coals stoked. When bumps in the road come up, Libra is forgiving – but only up to a point. Too many transgressions and the gloves come off. Appreciation of art and beauty through its Venus rulership — beauty both in nature and man-made — make this an excellent marriage sign for those for whom “the other” is of primary importance and relationship in and of itself is vital for life. Seeing and bringing out the best in each other is part of the mutual appreciation that makes Libra unions last.
OCTOBER 23 – NOVEMBER 22. SCORPIO, the Scorpion, the Eagle and the Phoenix. As private as Cancer may be, the energy of Scorpio can take introversion to an extreme. While this may not be a good sign for social and outgoing people to marry under, the emphasis on a strong sex life and money may be appealing to some. Nor is Scorpio for the faint-hearted, as all issues and qualities come under intense scrutiny to rival Virgo. When operating positively, marriage under this sign makes the partners feel exalted; when negative, it feels like the end of the world. The triple rulership describes the spectrum of Scorpio energy — from scorpions who will sting themselves to death if no one else is around to inflict their venom on, to the eagle who can fly high and surmount earthly concerns, to the phoenix who rises from the ashes of its own death to soar to the sun. Tremendous power for transformation is potential in this sign, yet few outlets exist for releasing the pressures of life under this Mars-Pluto rulership. Intense individuals may be the only ones who can withstand this energy.
NOVEMBER 22 – DECEMBER 22. SAGITTARIUS, the Archer. Pack your bags, because if you marry under Sagittarius, the wanderer, you may find yourself changing addresses or taking trips more than the average. If not traveling externally, the expansive influence of Jupiter-ruled Sagittarius will invite partners to broaden their mental and spiritual horizons with explorations into the new, the distant, and the mystical. Very outgoing and social, this sign feels like the opposite of Scorpio and enjoys nature, perhaps even sports, and values higher education and learning. An idealistic energy, Sagittarius, like Gemini, can bounce back quickly from troubles — that is, if it hasn’t taken off to some distant place already. This is a great energy for couples who want to live free before taking on the responsibilities of family, or for marriages of independent, outgoing couples, perhaps later in life who want to stretch their wings.
DECEMBER 22 – JANUARY 20. CAPRICORN, the Goat. This serious, Saturn-ruled energy is all about ambition, recognition, climbing the ladder of success, and pinnacles of accomplishment. Energetic workaholics do well under this approval-seeking influence. Saturn also rules “time,” so couples marrying under this sign may be in for the long haul, despite the personal hardships such an energy exacts. While most marriage vows do promise lifelong commitment, these days that’s not often the case. In the words of a friend, it’s “for better or for worse, but not for long.” Perhaps marriages under Capricorn fare better than the statistics, I don’t know. Often overlooked qualities which Saturn rules may help with stabilizing a marriage, and they are humor and the wisdom that comes with experience. This is a good sign for couples with worldly ambitions, whether they are just starting out or are second marriages with strong status values.
JANUARY 20 – FEBRUARY 18. AQUARIUS, the Water-Bearer. Under this sign of friendship and long-term goals, partners with a compatible vision for life may find support for joint ventures and feeling as though they’d married their “best friend.” Opposite to the personal expression of will in creative Leo, Aquarian marriages may be called to a higher purpose under God’s will in selecting which goals they will work toward. Not emotionally rich like Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces, the temperature under Aquarius can be on the cool side, more like the mental Gemini and Libra. To others, Aquarian couples may appear aloof — that is, until you get to know them and appreciate their dedication and drive. Couples with strong social, environmental, or other causes are well supported by this sign, as are those who are truly the best of friends.
FEBRUARY 18 – MARCH 20. PISCES, the Fish. Dreamy Pisces is as idealistic as Sagittarius, but in an even more mystical sense; as romantic as Libra, but in a more spiritual sense; and as service-oriented as Virgo, but in almost a religious, rather than duty-oriented sense. Pisces marriages find harmony being close to water or in the feeling of the partners flowing into and out of each other. Boundaries are nebulous here and individuality runs a far second to at-one-ment with the cosmos. If this all sounds like too far a reach for most humans, consider the down-side of this energy — confusion, denial, deception and addiction. While successful Pisces unions require a clear commitment to the highest ideals (which marriage is designed to elicit from us anyway), daily renewal of these visions — whether through prayer, meditation, uplifting reading or music — are necessary to keep this gentle and loving energy operating on its high side.
MARCH 20 – APRIL 20. ARIES, the Ram. Sign of spring and renewal, Aries can be a wonderful marriage sign, where it finds an influence of daily newness and highly charged, Mars-ruled, pure life energy, as physical as it gets. Being born and daily re-born closely describes the feelings of “honeymooning,” when each sees the other freshly and sex is enthusiastic. For couples with high sexual needs without the intensity of Scorpio, it is a good sign. For those more moderate in need for physical expression, it may become a burden which can rapidly turn to frustration and anger when not permitted the outlet. A master of new beginnings, one of Aries’ challenges is seeing things through to the end. This works well for busy couples with few domestic and family goals, but is difficult when partially mowed lawns or incomplete projects littering the household get in the way of daily living.
APRIL 20 – MAY 21. TAURUS, the Bull. Our circle around the zodiac is completed in Taurus, an earthy and materialistic energy ruled by Venus in her more physical expressions. Like Aries, Taurus enjoys physical intimacy but is more suited to couples staying together for the long haul than Aries, as Taurus is a fixed and possessive sign. It has the kind of energy that, even if a marriage doesn’t last on paper, it will be held onto in the heart (which sometimes isn’t welcome in a new post-divorce relationship!). Taurus enjoys material comforts and thrives when partners express appreciation for each other with frequent complements and displays of affection. Sometimes high-maintenance financially, this sign is always high maintenance emotionally, for its need for continual affection and approval.
How to Use This Information
In choosing a perfect wedding date for both of you, you want to step back and view the big picture of your lives together. Project yourself through all the stages of life and what the future may have in store for you — from the honeymoon through working at jobs or finishing school, to build a certain level of security and success, raising a family (if this is part of your agreement) and seeing them grow and move on, to retiring together when it’s just the two of you again.
Finding one sign that supports or reflects all of life’s stages seems improbable. But being realistic about yourself and your partner’s qualities and values will help guide you to select the most appropriate marriage energy to start with.
There’s another option, however, one which is increasing in popularity and for good reason… the renewal of marriage vows. Mostly we hear of couples re-vowing out of love or because of a recent reconciliation after a time of trial. But you might think of renewing your vows as a way to ‘adjust’ your marriage energy to better match the changes that you both are moving through in various life stages.
Consider this: Renewal of vows essentially “re-starts” the marriage. Given what you have read about the influence of various signs, you can see how valuable this re-starting could prove to be.
For example, say you choose Capricorn as your wedding sign. You are both up-and-coming professionals who want to dedicate yourselves to building position and security for some years. Once you are ready to have children, you can renew your vows under Cancer or Leo. When the children are grown, a Gemini or Aquarian, Libran or Sagittarian renewal may then better suit your lifestyle.
The option to renew vows frees you from feeling locked in to just one marriage energy to live with and work with for a lifetime. It also feels like it better suits our changing lifestyles and the pace of living in today’s world.
So, how does a couple renew vows? This can be as formal as asking your clergy-person to preside over a ceremony in your house of worship with invited family and guests, or as personal and informal as the two of you on a beach or in a park with some special person as a witness. The pivotal aspect of vow renewal is your mutual intention. Ideally, you will each write your vows from your hearts and exchange them openly, whole-heartedly, and with as much intention as your original wedding vows.
Harnessing the universal energies for your marriage, and later for a renewal of your vows, aligns you with the cycles of life and brings you into harmony with the cosmic whole, so that Life itself might support you in having the kind of marriage you’ve always dreamed of. I hope this information helps all your marriage dreams come true.